Stay-at-Home Dad Survival Guide

NPR's Marketplace Money, personal PR

Monday, 08 December 2008 17:23

I was interviewed for Marketplace Money which will air this weekend (1:00 PM Sunday on KUOW).

It was very fun, went into KUOW's studio, put on headphones, spoke into a big mic and talked about using time not employed by someone else to explore your creative side, do the things you love, spend time with family, and work on finding the right job.

Who knows what they'll use, but hopefully they'll mention this Stay-at-Home Dad Survival Guide.

It might go on their website.

Local air times are here: http://marketplace.publicradio.org/stations/index.php

Audio file will be posted here:
http://marketplace.publicradio.org/episodes/show_rundown.php?show_id=8

Please listen and let me know what you think.

Prunes

Monday, 08 December 2008 17:21

I'm a regular guy.

That doesn't happen by accident (see oatmeal below).

For years people have mocked me for eating prunes, but they rank up there with bananas, oatmeal, and pork in the pantheon of perfect foods.

Buy them, eat them, teach your kids to eat them. Nature's candy. Kids on refined sugar are a nightmare.

This post brought to you by Sun-Maid, my preferred provider of Dried Pitted Plums http://www.sun-maid.com/en/products/products_apricots.html#plums_1

I just can't get started in the morning without a piping-hot pot of coffee and a handful of prunes. I've tried other enemas they just don't seem to work.

Tip 5: Breakfasting

Monday, 08 December 2008 17:20

The most important meal of the day, yet also the most difficult to execute with the clock ticking.

WARNING: This is the beginning of the shameless marketing portion of the program, look for links to products I endorse.

1. Oatmeal. Not just any oatmeal, Quaker Old Fashioned Original http://tinyurl.com/5nktwq
Five minutes versus one...really, does it make such a difference. True, time is of the essence, so in the race to get ready, oatmeal is like the starting gun. Boil water, insert oatmeal (you'll get the portioning down with practice, hint use more water, when the oatmeal sits and softens it will get too thick otherwise).

The flavored instant stuff is a luxury you don't require (buy brown sugar http://www.chsugar.com/, you know...Pure cane sugar...from Hawaii...growin' in the Sun...C&H pure cane sugar...it's the one...) At the bare minimum cooking oatmeal gives you plausible deniability when the wife asks "did you make them breakfast?" You did, did they eat it, well...some things are best left unsaid. (If left uneaten, eat the stuff yourself, it's the right thing to do and the tasty way to do it [God bless Wilford Brimley http://tinyurl.com/5eekxr]).

2. Agree upon a weekly menu. It sounds like I'm pampering the kid, but it helps to have their buy off on what they'll eat before I lay a bowl of oatmeal in front of them. Saves some frustration in the morning, although there always exists the risk of the fickle addled brains of your splendid youth changing his/her mind(s) by Friday. Review menu as needed and stock fridge accordingly. (See Upcoming Tip "fulfill promises").

3. Make Nothing for Yourself. Trust me there are always leftovers and you can survive (indeed, grow large) eating only what's left on your kid(s[']) plates. This takes a strong stomach and the essential component of parenting, loss of self. You are no longer the 20-something happy-go-lucky man-about-town. You are a father, and that means, every once in a while you'll be eating regurgitated oatmeal. Consider yourself like the mommy bird who eats the worm, returns to the nest and then expels the food from her stomach into her chick's mouth. It's like that, but in reverse.

Tip 4: Listen

Monday, 08 December 2008 17:19

Newsflash, our children learn from us. This is why we are so disappointed when they go to jail for inciting riots,or feel pride, as the case may be.

They are a reflection of us and as such not only share our genes, they follow our examples. "Do as I say not as I do" doesn't fly. So, if you want your kids to listen to you, you have to listen to them. Don't sit there at the computer typing some silly blog or Facebook status when the guy is in the kitchen asking for more juice. If you ignore him, he'll just learn to ignore you.

Now, gotta go, as frycook, waitress, busboy I don't have many moments to spare before 7 am, the bus, the bus, we're gonna be late for the bus!